physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
just tell him i said nine months
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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