My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
