at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Dick very happy bro
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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