At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize