Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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