dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
