Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Randomize
