You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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