I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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