he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
did i just pee glitter
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
You ever have a fart follow you around?
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
