But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
