i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize
