it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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