i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
