haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
