Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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