whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I AM VODKA MAN
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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