I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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