So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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