I'm gonna have a badass scar
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I just cut my nipple shaving
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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