Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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