Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Randomize
