hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
