do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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