Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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