Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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