6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
