We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
