it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
