Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize