Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
