She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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