I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize