I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
