dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
