Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
