guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
