the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Randomize
