I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Randomize
