She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
