It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
