Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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