Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
