that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
