Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
