When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
