never play flip cup with pint glasses
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
