I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
