so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Randomize
