I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
